Going away to college is a major change for most young adults. For many, it is their first time living on their own, managing funds or handling tasks like doctor visits. While it may be difficult to adjust to the college lifestyle, it teaches people how to be independent and in control of decisions and consequences.
However, parents and guardians can also have a hard time with this transition. In my case, my parents became empty-nesters, as I was their last child to stop fully living at home. It was tough for my mom to adjust to not having me there to help around the house or even to just sit and watch a movie with her, but she knew I was off learning and becoming the person I wanted to be.
Not all parents are ready to fully let go of their children, though. Parents are hiring local moms in other states to take care of their children while they are away at school. These “concierge moms” aid their specific student when they are sick, help them make appointments, offer academic support and even drop off birthday and other holiday-themed gifts. Parents can buy a monthly, semester, full-year or all four-year package, each upgrade coming with more benefits. They don’t cook, clean or iron, but does this still hold students back from being independent?
Honestly, I think this is a situation that allows parents to still helicopter their children and for their kids to continue relying on someone else rather than learning for themselves. I do not believe that this “concierge mom” service is beneficial to either party.
The woman behind the service, Mindy Horwitz, argues that it gives “parents peace of mind knowing that [they’re] here to help when they need some extra support.” She gave an example of bringing a toothbrush and pajamas to a student who was in the emergency room when her parents could not make it.
The way I see it though, a friend could have simply done that for free. Yes, having a knowledgeable adult there may feel more comfortable, but at some point, a person has to know how to assess the situation themselves. I’m not saying that calling a parent and asking them for help is a sign of weakness, but I am saying that hiring a concierge mom for $49 a month is ridiculous.
Parents can easily send their child a package of goodies for much less than a $300 “Congratulations Graduate Package,” and students can learn how to adapt to their new environment and be independent.
The hard truth is that someday, our parents won’t be here to take care of us and we’ll have to make our own dentist appointments and send out our own FedEx packages. College is the perfect place and time to practice self-support, and students and parents should recognize that.
ajones11@ramapo.edu
Featured photo courtesy of PennUniversityLife, Flickr
